633 Find the way to redeem me
What is the use of finding fault in me?
Why you refuse to see the goodness in me
Oh my Guruji, once I come unto your feet
What is the profit of becoming upset with me?
Though you become tired of teaching me
Or forgot to say something
Other than coming around you
Where is the other way for me to go?
Though you forgave me, I never changed
My dull mind has never gone
The trouble that I face with my mind
Never come to an end
I never lack humility
I never forgot to do bhakti
Yet in this wretched heart
I find no change at all
Don’t you know all these?
Don’t you understand my situation?
Still if you began to contest
What kind of response I could give?
Ok let it be, never become upset with me (again)
Don’t come to fight with me
Show bit further mercy
And find the means to redeem me
Mathigiri, 25-4-17, 2.10 pm.
When I read the following point, stopping reading I wrote this song complaining to God and in the final line reminding Him to find the means for me to redeem me again.
…We dare not complain. Yet, if one may not complain, one’s heart goes hard – as this was widespread in the history of Christianity, because the Christians were not allowed to complain (and needed Auschwitz to wake up—extermination camps)
The issue is admitting complaint, i.e. the complaint addressed to God – like Job’s. That I must and may accuse God leads also to my no longer being able to set him free from his responsibility by saying: together with me he accuses ‘fate,’ ‘the circumstances.’ This is exactly why I insist on saying: he is not powerless, but he is responsible, he is the addressee of my complaint. And therein complaint is in agreement with thanksgiving that he is acknowledged as being responsible and as authority. Therefore Job’s friends are condemned and not Job. The complaint precisely presupposes rejecting the powerlessness of God, although it originates in God’s not-showing-himself. Where is your face? Why for so long? These are the questions in point and I think they are anything but worldless.—Jorg Splett, Questions and Interventions, “Man as Answer” in Christian Faith in Dialogue with Hindu Religious Traditions [Christian Faith in the Encounter with Hinduism 2], Andreas Bsteh (ed.), Modling 2007, St Gabriel Publications, pp. 253-316, p. 307
633 மீட்கும் வழியைப்பாரு
குறை சொல்லிப் பயனென்ன
குணம் காண மறுத்தென்ன
குருவே உன்சரண் வந்தபின்
கோபம் கொண்டல் லாபமென்ன?
சொல்லிச்சொல்லிச் சோர்ந்த்திட்டலும்
சொல்ல மறுத்துப் போய்விட்டாலும்
செக்கு மாடுபோல் உன்னைச்சுற்றி
வருவதன்றி வழியும் என்ன?
மன்னித்தாலும் மாறவில்லை
மந்த புத்தியும் போகவில்லை
மனமென்னும் குரங்குடன் நான்
படும் பாடும் ஓயவில்லை
பணிவிற்கும் குறை வில்லை
பக்தி பண்ண மறக்கவில்லை
பாழும் இந்த மனதினிலோ
மாற்றம் ஒன்றும் காணவில்லை
இதெல்லாம் நீ அறியாயோ
என்நிலையும் நீ புரியாயோ
இதன்பின் வழக்காடினால் உனக்கு
என்னபதில் நான் சொல்லவோ
சரிவிடு கோபிக்காதே வீண்
சண்டை செய்ய வந்திடாதே
இன்னும் கொஞ்சம் இரக்கம்காட்டு
என்னை மீட்கும் வழியைப்பாரு
மத்திகிரி, 25-4-17, மதியம் 2.10